


You Will Never Understand.

by East_of_dema



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Amputation, Amputee, Disability, Hospitals, M/M, Rehab, attepted suicide, awkward frick frack snick snack, wheelchair
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-07
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-29 08:11:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10849968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/East_of_dema/pseuds/East_of_dema
Summary: Tyler Joseph loses his arm and suffers horrible burns from an accident...It was just an accident, right?





	1. You will never know

Tyler was never your typical child.

From the day he was born on God's green earth everyone knew he was different. From the way he acted and walked to the art that he created. He had an amazing gift with people and animals; being able to analyze and assess the situation before taking action.

Tyler was relatively good at school as well. A's and B's to his parents joy.

Tyler was smart like that.

So, if Tyler was so smart, why was he currently waiting crouched in the muddy grass next to the highway?

Well, you see, Tyler was gifted at everything under the sun it seemed- except for the fact that he couldn't handle the constant loom of getting older and having to create a name for himself to satisfy his peers- mainly his parents.

So naturally when you can't handle the stress and being at that age where all the chemicals in your brain more often than not start fucking things up in your head, one of the first things that pops into your head is to kill yourself before things can get any worse. And that's what Tyler was doing. The fifteen year old boy left a note to his parents on the fridge that he was going to walk to the store a few blocks away to get some redbull and snacks for studying so they would think that this was just a horrible accident.

And horrible accident it was.

When Tyler thought he found the perfect car to jump in front of things didn't go quite as planned. The first thing that happened was that Tyler had forgotten that he was fiddling with his right shoelace and it had become untied.

The second thing was Tyler tripping over said shoelace and face planting just feet away from the speeding car, just missing him.

The third thing(s) that went wrong happened in the blink of an eye. Since that car hadn't hit Tyler the one behind it was sure to, right?

Wrong... Well, sorta.

The car that was rapidly coming towards him and spotted him laying in the middle of the right lane to Tyler's dismay. The lady who was driving the car- Tyler couldn't remember what kind of car it was, but it was something you'd probably find a soccer mom driving- tried to brake and when her brakes screamed, but didn't seem to be doing much she swerved into the left lane.

Unfortunately for the both of them there happened to be other cars on the highway. Surprising.

She collided with a bright colored sports car that spun out of control, spraying gasoline everywhere and slamming against the metal guardrail. The car the woman was driving flipped and teetered over onto Tyler's left arm, barely missing his head and crushing the bones instantly.

Tyler cried out in pain, struggling to get his arm out from under the wrecked vehicle. He didn't realize that there were sirens going off in the distance, he didn't even think about the smoke that was started to burn his lungs or the fact that even more screams erupted when the gas that had sprayed all over the asphalt caught fire and was moving towards him.

Tyler was smart like that.


	2. What's under my skin

Tyler woke up in Saint John's hospital nine days later.

His left lower arm just above the elbow had to be amputated because of how extensive the damage was. Because of the fire he also had severe 2nd and 3rd degree burns that went from the base of his neck down down his left side to the curve of his backside, leaving horrible blotchy scars.

Tyler's parents were mortified to find out that Tyler needed to have his arm amputated two days after being admitted. They would have amputated it sooner, but his parents insisted that they see all the options that they could do before they did anything "too extreme."

When the doctors told them that there was no other option for Tyler, Chris had to take a walk and didn't come back until visiting hours were almost over. Kelly had carefully laid down on the hospital bed next to her son, being mindful of his injuries, tubes and machinery that was attached to his body. She gently carded her fingers through his hair like she used to do for him when he was a younger. Once the doctors, and the nurse that asked her if she needed anything had left she broke down.

"Oh my baby boy," She cried, kissing the top of his head, "You're going to be okay," The last of the sentence was more for her than him.

"Good morning Tyler. How are you doing?" Tyler's overly-joyful nurse greeted him, medication and clipboard in hand. Tyler held up what was left of his arm that was wrapped in thick gauze and waved at her.

"Doing great, thanks," He replied thick with sarcasm. Her smile fell and her lips pressed together in what would probably have been a thin line if it weren't for the obvious Botox injections.

"Right," She mumbled and then started checking his dressings. Tyler was tempted to say "no, it's actually my left," But he figured he shouldn't mess with her anymore. His other nurse he messed with _a little too much_.

She doesn't check on him anymore.

She slowly unwrapped the bandages from the healing flesh. Tyler winced when some of the scabs stuck to it and pulled painfully at them. This was the second time he had seen his arm since the accident and somehow it was actually worse than the first time. It was all black and blue and bruised and looked absolutely horrible. The nurse looked up to see his face contorted in disgust and she smiled up at him. "It's bruising. You're actually healing very well."

"Gross."

Tyler rolled over and threw up on the floor.


	3. What's under my hair

 

  
Two days after Tyler got the stitches out of his arm he was allowed to go home. Most of the burns were fully healed except for a patch higher up on his side towards his back. The bandage had to be changed everyday. Now that his arm was gone it made a very awkward angle impossible to reach by himself.

Tyler and his mom were currently in their bathroom upstairs changing his bandages. She was trying to gently peel the dressing away from the wound. "Ow- mom, just pull it off fast," Tyler flinched away from her touch.

"Nurse said not to do that, remember?" Tyler groaned, resting his forehead on his hand. His butt was starting to hurt from sitting on the toilet for so long.

He also needed help showering and cleaning himself. Which to say the least was awkward as hell.

The doctors told them it would get easier over time as he healed and learned how to live without his arm.

"It's starting to granulate in nicely," Kelly commented while washing Tyler's hair in the bath. "It looks better than the others," She finished without thinking.

"All of them are ugly," Tyler replied. She didn't really have a comeback for that so she just kept quiet till she was done helping him. Before leaving she kissed the top of his head.

"You're still my beautiful baby boy." As soon as the door shut behind her, Tyler started looking over his body.

The scars were ugly and red and pink and Tyler hated it. Besides his back there was a few other areas that still had scabs, but they didn't need to have anything done to them. His arm wasn't smooth like you often see in movies. It was bumpy, a little uneven and it had a dimple on either side. Tyler willed himself not to cry as he slowly got out of the tub with shaking legs.

Getting the towel wrapped around his waste was another challenge, but he did it none the less. He brushed his teeth and ruffled his hair. At least it was his left arm and not his right. That would have made this suck even more.

Tyler got dressed in his room by himself. It was awkward like everything else, but there was no way he was asking anyone to help him. He already had about a half dozen nurses and doctors see his junk at the hospital and he'd like to keep his mother off that list if he could.

He was at the age where things were happening to him on top of everything else that he didn't want people to see.

After a few months Kelly decided that Tyler should go to group therapy.

He was spending most, if not all his time on his room. Tyler wouldn't shower for days, refused to go to school so they started homeschooling him. Tyler didn't want to go to therapy to be with, "Others like him," he just wanted to sit in his room all day and draw and write.

He felt safe there. There we no one to give him weird looks or children to ask what happened to him. On one occasion he told a bratty kid that he didn't listen to his parents and a monster got him. He thought it was fucking hilarious when the kid's eyes grew wide and ran away crying to his parents.

The parents didn't have the same sense of humor that Tyler did.

"This is stupid," Tyler mumbled in the back seat of their minivan. The windows were tinted back there so people couldn't really see inside. Tyler's mom and dad were in the front talking about something that Tyler wasn't paying attention to. He just kept his eyes on the scenery that was passing by.

When they got to the church that the meetings were being held at they dropped him off at the door. Tyler would have liked his parents to have at least walked him inside, but they said that they had errands to do. They each hugged him tightly and told him to have fun before leaving him standing by himself in front of the double glass doors.

Tyler pulled on the front of his grey hoodie anxiously as he made his way up the stairs and down the hall looking for the room where it was being held. He could hear laughter coming from a room on the left down towards the end of the hall. The door was open all the way and there was a mix of about a dozen young and older teens. An older woman sat at the head of the circle who Tyler assumed was the one in change.

Tyler stood in the doorway awkwardly, completely silent and unnoticed until a girl with a patch over about half of her face pointed him out.

"Mrs. Crowley, who's that boy over there?" She pointed at Tyler. The woman looked up in surprise, smiling widely.

"You must be Tyler," She said softly.

Tyler didn't like it.

"Don't be shy, please come in and sit down," Her voice was a little louder this time. He took a seat that was by the window so he could look outside and pretend that he was in some far off land.

After a few minutes Mrs. Crowley cleared her throat. "Ok, it appears that everyone that's going to show up today is here." She adjusted so she could sit more comfortable. Tyler noticed the glint of a prosthetic peaking out from between the opening of her pant leg and purple sock.

Mrs. Crowley was one of them.

"I'll start first. I'm Mrs. Crowley, I'm 37 years old and I lost my left leg from the knee down in a car accident 19 years ago." She turned to the girl next to her that pointed Tyler out, signaling that it was her turn.

"My name's Melanie, I'm 13 years old and I lost my left eye from a pink eye infection that didn't get treated."

"Brendon, 17 years old and I had to get two of my fingers amputated and I have  a spinal injury that prevents me from feeling anything below the waist." Brendon sighed and leaned back into his wheelchair, turning to a boy next to him, also in a wheelchair.

He had dark lose curls that was shorter on the sides, brown eyes and a big nose that was actually oddly cute. His ears were stretched, nose ring and a colorful tattoo sleeve that Tyler couldn't tell what it was from where he was sitting.

"My name's Joshua and I turned 19 yesterday," When he spoke Tyler could see that he also had a tongue piercing. "I was born with underdeveloped legs that my parents decided would be best if they were taken off when I was 6 months old." Josh didn't seem the least bit upset about not having legs. In fact, Josh smiled throughout the whole time.

Tyler listened to all the other stories half heartedly. He had his eyes trained on Josh from under the shadow of his hood. The older boy didn't seem to notice as he spoke briefly to Brendon when there was pauses between people speaking.

The room grew uncomfortably quiet, all eyes on Tyler, Josh making direct eye contact with him. "Tyler, why are you here?" Mrs. Crowley asked too sweetly.

"My name's Tyler, I'm almost 16 and I lost my left arm and have burns-"  Tyler's heart skipped a beat when he almost said why he actually lost his arm. "From an accident," He finished quietly.

If there was someone else's turn after him he wouldn't know. Tyler at that point had completely shut down and refused to answer anyone who tried talking to him.

When the meeting was over Josh rolled over to Tyler slowly until he was directly in front of him. Tyler didn't look up until Josh tapped his shoulder, making him jolt. "Sorry," Josh apologized. "I wanted to make sure you're okay."

"I'm okay," Tyler gave him a small smile. Josh held out his hand for Tyler to shake.

"Josh." Tyler hesitantly slotted his hand into Josh's, heart skipping a beat when the older boy gripped his hand and shook it firmly.

"Tyler." They both let their hands drop as Mrs. Crowley finished putting the chairs away.

"Alright boys, make sure the doors are locked when you leave."

"Shit, I forgot to ask if you needed help cleaning up," Josh cursed as he turned his chair around to face her. She smiled and just waved her hand.

"It's okay. You two were talking so I didn't want to interrupt.

They said their goodbyes and hugged briefly. She only gave Tyler s small wave before leaving the room. Josh sighed, turning back to Tyler. Tyler could feel himself frowning smaller under his gaze.

"So," Josh started, tilting his head, "How did you lose your arm?"


End file.
